I turned off the music and decided to talk to my mum once more, but this time in a mature way: she and I are real. The real Misha, not the hysterical Misha.
Mum was sitting in her office going through some papers, but as soon as I entered the office, she took her eyes off the papers and looked at me with a smile.
– I want to talk» I said in a calm tone as I walked to her desk and sat down on the chair next to it.
Mum smiled affectionately once more and put the papers aside.
– 'Of course, sweetheart. About what?
I felt irritated again: the word «sweetheart» instead of my name put me in the position of a child. But I held back my anger and drew in more air.
– Listen to me, please» I began. – I realise that I am a late child and that I am very young. But I don't think that's an argument for you to disregard my opinion.
– Is this about that again? I thought we'd already settled this» Mum said with a tired smile.
– That's the thing, we haven't. How can I explain it to you? You all don't trust me, and it depresses me. – I considered every word carefully. – You don't believe in my independence, you don't believe that I can decide something on my own, without you: without you, Dad, brothers and sisters.
– Misha, of course, we trust you, but you must understand: in our world, as well as in the human world, there are rules that must be observed by everyone. If everyone acts only according to their own wishes, there will be disorder in the world, and the system built over centuries will collapse. Moreover, you should remember that in our world the rules are immutable, and only thanks to them we can live in peace and successfully hide our existence from mortals. Humans are imperfect, yes, they have a lot of freedom, but they have nothing to hide, and we do.
– I understand this perfectly well, but you should also understand my position: I believe in my own strength and in the fact that I can take care of myself.
– Honey, I'm not saying you can't take care of yourself. I'm saying that you can't do it yet, because of your age. You have to accept that. You have a lot to learn: everything we have achieved is the result of effort, hardship, training and exercise.
– So teach me all that! – I objected.
– It's too early for you to learn it: the first killings are shocking, so you have to be prepared for them, first of all, mentally.